Canadian Parenting

Empathy and Positivity

Empathy

I mentioned already in my previous posts that Canadians are known to be kind people. Canadians learn a lot about empathy, kindness, compassion, and forgiveness during their upbringing. They hear these words in their families and in their society.

Although I was a sensitive and empathetic child growing up, I only learned that I should be thinking about myself and be tough. I considered empathy and sensitivity to be my weakness. However, in Canada I learned to consider it a strength. Ability to be empathetic, to understand and share the feelings of another doesn’t make you weak. It makes you a human. And it makes you a good human. Lack of empathy on the other side contributes directly to our tendencies towards narcissism, materialism, violence, and aggression.

Playground. Leduc, Alberta

Children learn empathy both from watching us and from experiencing our empathy for them. When we empathize with our children they develop trusting, secure attachments with us. When they get older, they are able to develop trusting, secure attachments with others.

In countries like Denmark, where you see people leave their children sleeping outside in baby strollers, lost wallets are returned with money inside, you start to understand trust and happiness comes hand in hand. Trust is learned during childhood from parents, teachers, and other members of society. It lasts for a lifetime and is passed on from generation to generation.

In some western cultures children are encouraged to practice being empathetic at schools. For example, Danish schools decided to introduce mandatory empathy classes in 1993, to teach children aged 6-16 how to be kind. The class runs for one hour each week, and it is as important as Mathematics.

In Alberta where I lived, there is day in February called “Pink shirt day” when both children and adults wear pink shirts to schools to practice being kind and prevent bullying. Children in Canada also are also encouraged to support causes that matter to them through volunteering or fundraising activities.

Positivity

Canadian parents are the most positive and chill parents I’ve ever seen. Somehow Canadians can always see positive side in everything. They also teach their children to stay positive by being an example. They have great sense of humor and somehow can redirect their children to see positive side and feel better in different situations. They like to praise children and make them feel special. Canadian people love to have fun together and entertain their children.

In eastern cultures people love all that too. However, it seems that older the children get, parents start to brush them off, telling them to go and do their own things. When in the West, teenagers seem to enjoy a company of their parents and grandparents because they are still fun. You can see older kids riding bikes with their parents, hiking, going camping, going to museums, playing boards games, learning new things together and continuing making memories with their families through their whole childhood.

I guess Canadian parents understand that best legacy we can leave to our children is happy childhood memories. Some Canadian parents and grandparents I met also seem to be mentally and physically younger than they are. In my opinion due to their positivity and love for active life they don’t lose full connection to their inner children.

Negativity, criticism and too much complaining is not something I’ve seen in Canadian homes much. Unless it is political, sport related, or some news related discussion. Canadians really put an effort into having peaceful and cozy times together by leaving all negativity behind. Positivity and kindness are contagious. Being surrounded by people who are kind and positive improves your mental health and happiness level.

In Canada I was able to become more positive person by practicing gratitude, engaging in positive self talk and spending time with positive people.

Fall in Alberta, Canada